This Morning My Son Taught Me One of Life’s Greatest Lessons. And it Broke My Heart.

This morning was one of those warm, rainy, drizzly days where you think you can walk through it without getting wet, but before you know it you’re drenched.  I was going through my normal morning routine with my three children, just trying to get them out the door to take my son to school so I could make my way to the grocery store.  With the normal hiccups of the morning (getting my daughter into her stroller, getting the stroller down the stairs, etc) I asked my son for help per usual.  He’s a bit of a daydreamer which I actually love, but on mornings like this, it just served as an irritant for me.  I had to ask him repeatedly to put down his umbrella to help me bring the stroller down the stairs which at the time seemed like an unachievable task to him.  He finally did it, but there was a quiver of the lip after my not so gentle requests for him to “hurry up” and “get it together”.

After that small hiccup, we were on our way in the rain to school.  No more than 20 steps into our walk, I hear whimpering.  My son had begun having issues with his umbrella and couldn’t keep up with me.  The whimpering turned into whines, and the whines into “I JUST CAN’T DO IT!!” followed by sniffles and crying.  *sigh*  I’m not one who’s against crying, but nothing irritates me more than whining and crying over EVERYTHING.  I’m one of those people that bulldozes through every frustration and I unrealistically expect the same of my son.  However, what I said was, “You CAN do this.  Now, get it together and follow me.  You’re going to be late if we don’t stop this nonsense.”  I just called my son’s feelings nonsense.  Shit.

My son’s face clearly showed not just frustration now, but the beginnings of defeat.  His head hung low, and his little feet rushing to catch up to my long and speedy stride, I just hoped that he would shake it off and make it to school.  But could I leave it alone?  Nope.  I kept trying to give him advice.  I mentioned how he was a big boy now.  How he couldn’t act like this when he begins his taekwan-do lessons next week.  And THIS and THAT and THIS and THAT.  I was THAT mother.  The nagging, irritating, commanding mother.  What happened next broke my heart.

He just stopped and started sobbing.  And really sobbing from his heart.  Not the whiney, whimpers that I heard earlier.  True sadness pouring from his little body.  I stopped in my tracks.  I no longer cared if we were going to be late.  Locking the stroller, and slowly crouching down, I opened my arms and just held him.  Feeling his tears trickle down my neck I knew I needed to listen to the small, gentle boy that I call my son.  So, I asked him, “What’s wrong?  Why are you crying?”  He said, “I’m crying because I’m hurting.  That’s what you do when you hurt.  You cry.  I’m just trying to be 6.  And…I feel really bad about myself.”  He broke down crying again and I about started crying myself as I held him.

I looked into his ocean colored eyes and really looked at him.  He’s still a baby.  He’s my baby.  With the other two babies that I have, I’ve forgotten that he’s still one himself.  Studying his little face, I began to say the words to him that I should’ve said a long time ago.  I said:

“I want you to listen to me…and listen to me closely.  You are stronger than you know.  Do you know why?  Because you’re you.  I know you feel weak sometimes.  That is ok.  But you need to remember that you aren’t weak.  You are strong.  And you are beautiful.  Do you know why you are strong?  Because I am strong.  Because you’re my boy.  You will always be my boy.  I want you to know something else.  When I was little, I cried too.  I cried a lot but was told not to cry.  That’s why I said those words to you.  And you know what?  I was wrong.  You were right.  When it hurts inside, you do cry.  And that’s okay.  I love you little man.”

This was one of the first times my son listened to me with his eyes locked with mine in a very long time.  He took every word I said and let it soak in just like he did all the other times I used those rushed words of hurry, worry and anxiety.  In fact, what I fail to realize on a daily basis is that he listens to EVERYTHING I say.  And he takes it to heart.  And what I was saying was making him hurt.  After a hug, a kiss, and another ‘I love you’, we began making our way to school again.  About a block away from where we last stopped, I hear, “mama?”  to which I said, “Yes little man?”  “I’m still sad.”  I figured he would be a little sad, but the reason why is what blew me away.  I stopped again to face my little guy and asked “Why?”  He looked at me with his wide innocent eyes, and said, “Because I didn’t know I was special.  I thought I couldn’t be special until I was a big person.”  *heart breaking again*

To this I replied:

“You are especially special because you AREN’T a big person.  You’ve been special from the very day you were born and will continue to be special everyday from there forward.  Do you know why you are special to me?   You were my first baby.  Before you, I wasn’t a mama.  That means you are forever special to me in my heart.  You will always be my first baby.  My special baby boy.”

A hint of a smile crossed his face and a flicker of the glimmer in his eye returned.

When we arrived to school I told him that I wanted him to remember two things today.

Number 1: You ARE Special

Number 2: I love you.

We repeated those two reminders a few times before parting ways this morning.  This is a morning that I will never forget.  Not because it was raining.  Not because we were going to be late.  But because today, I was forced to take a good hard look at myself and realize that I have a lot to learn about what it means to be human.  To allow myself moments to cry.  To allow myself moments to feel weak.  To allow myself to make mistakes and not yell at myself for them.  To allow myself the time to stroll instead of hurry.  But most of all…to take moments to stop and listen to my son because what he’s thinking and feeling comes directly from his heart.  And that alone in itself is something that can’t be taught.  It must be felt.  With all my heart.

Logan as a baby.  Me, as a new, first time mother.

Logan as a baby. Me, as a new, first time mother.

Thank you little man for being my greatest teacher this morning.

Need more than just one boost during the holidays? Customize a 6-pack of juice shots from Organic Avenue!

Buy organic, cold-pressed juices and cleanses at Organic Avenue today! juice

Mix and Match Package

Type of Juices Available:

ROYAL RED:  A perfectly sweet and brilliantly bold energizing powerhouse, this grown up interpretation of fruit punch has a ginger kick plus the benefits of grounding root vegetables. It’s a favorite juice for the kids and the kid at heart, providing energy, endurance, and a guilt-free sweet fix.
  • beets
  • carrots
  • pears
  • pineapples
  • oranges
  • lemon
  • ginger
  • energy
MATCH CHIA GLOW:  An OA fan favorite, our Matcha Chia Glo is a healthy and light interpretation of a bubbly green tea smoothie. Mineral-rich coconut sugar balances the flavor of earthy green matcha tea. Chia seeds add an unexpected twist to this healthy smoothie. The subtle energy boost makes it the perfect coffee replacement or pre-gym drink.
  • matcha
  • green tea
  • chia seeds
  • vanilla
  • cardamom
  • pumpkin seeds
  • coconut sugar
  • energy

SWEET GREENS:  Our sweetest and lightest green juice is a refreshing combination of non-bitter greens, cool pear, zesty orange, and a bite of fresh mint. It wakes up your taste buds and is fantastic for a green juice first-timer or veteran.

  • kale
  • swiss chard
  • collard greens
  • cucumbers
  • pears
  • oranges
  • lemon
  • mint
  • daily vitamins

MEDICINAL GREEN:  Our most potent green juice is a savory blend of leafy greens and earthy spices like turmeric, ginger, and cayenne pepper. Garlic and a pinch of Himalayan salt round out the earthy flavors and offer additional mineral and antimicrobial benefits. This medicinal drink is perfect if you’re under the weather, or simply want an overall health a boost.

  • greens
  • garlic
  • turmeric
  • lemon
  • cayennE
  • healing
  • immunity
JALAPINA: Greens with a jalapeño & cilantro kick! A hint of pineapple adds the perfect balance. Jalapeños contain capsaicin, which may be important for a wide range of healing functions.
  • greens
  • jalapeño
  • pineapplE
  • daily vitamins
  • cleansing

CARROT JUICE:   This is the perfect juice to satisfy a sweet tooth in a guilt-free way. Our carrot juice is naturally sweet and simple and great to drink alone or mix with other juices. Carrots are loaded with beta-carotene, important for our eyesight.

  • carrot
  • energy
  • immunity

SPICED PEAR GINGER:  Crisp and refreshing, with a sprinkling of warming spices, this juice not only tastes incredible, but also offers a host of health benefits. The cooling effect of pear juice may aid in reducing a fever, and its anti-inflammatory properties have been shown to soothe a seasonal sore throat.

  • pear
  • ginger
  • cinnamon
  • vanilla
  • clove
  • immunity

PEPPERMINT CHOCOLATE:  A sweet afternoon snack or guilt-free treat, Peppermint Chocolate leaves you feeling satiated and full of holiday joy! The creamy Cashew Hemp Mylk base is rich in protein, while raw cacao is loaded with antioxidants. Peppermint oil is a de-stressor and often used as a digestive aid.

  • cashews
  • dates
  • hemp seeds
  • cacao
  • peppermint
  • sweet fix

TURMERIC TONIC:  An earthy medicinal health tonic and multi-symptom reliever. Earthy spices like turmeric, cayenne pepper, and ginger create a unique take on a classic refreshing lemonade. This grounding tonic is a wonderful companion to a healthy lunch, or a mainstay in your recovery arsenal.

  • turmeric
  • lemon
  • ginger
  • coconut sugar
  • spices
  • energy

ORANGE JUICE:  The pure flavor of our organic orange juice is derived from our cold-pressed juicing method, which means that your daily glass of OJ is never heated and has never tasted better. Kids and adults love waking up to our version of sunshine in a bottle.

  • oranges
  • energy
  • immunity

MELLOW LOVE:  An alkalizing and refreshing low-sugar green juice that has a smooth, mellow taste made up of a nutrient-dense combination, including leafy romaine, spinach, and parsley as well as hydrating celery and cucumber. If you are looking for a low-sugar juice with no added fruit, mellow out and look no further.

  • romaine
  • celery
  • spinach
  • cucumbers
  • parsley

COCONUT MYLK:  Our delicate, light version of coconut milk is made from the flesh and water of young Thai coconuts – known for their sweetness. It is lightly blended for a refreshingly simple smoothie any time of the day.

  • coconut water
  • coconut meat
  • healing
  • meal replacement
  • daily vitamins

CAFE LATTE:  For our Cafe Latte, we cold brew organic coffee overnight for a bold flavor with less acidity. Our cold-brew coffee is then blended with our creamy protein-rich Cashew Hemp Mylk for a delectable, barista-approved pick-me-up.

  • cold-pressed coffee
  • cashew hemp mylk
  • energy

CASHEW HEMP MYLK:  Sinfully rich, yet angelically pure, our Cashew Hemp Mylk is a healthy indulgence that can be enjoyed as a breakfast, snack, or dessert. It is also the main ingredient in many of our smoothies, and a customer favorite to add to any of our organic coffees or teas.

  • cashews
  • hemp seeds
  • chia seeds
  • dates
  • meal replacement

GINGER LEMONADE:  A fiery twist on a classic, our Ginger Lemonade packs a strong ginger punch that is as refreshing as it is beneficial to the digestive system. Warming ginger is combined with tart lemon and mineral-rich coconut sugar to provide a true health tonic.

  • purified alkaline water
  • lemon
  • ginger
  • coconut sugar
  • healing

GRAPEFRUIT JUICE:   This subtly sweet citrus juice is pure healthy goodness in a bottle. Perfect for a morning wake-up call, grapefruit juice can set your digestion up for a healthier day ahead.

  • grapefruit
  • immunity
GREEN COCO JUICE:  Our Green Coco combines the benefits of green juice with the sweetness of organic Thai coconut water for a subtly sweet and refreshing juice that’s perfect to rehydrate and refresh your body before or after a workout.
  • greens
  • coconut water
  • daily vitamins
  • hydration
GREEN LOVE:  Our classic green juice is a slightly tart and lightly sweetened staple of a balanced diet. This green lemonade is best enjoyed in the morning on an empty stomach to reap all of the beneficial green LOVE we pack into every bottle.
  • kale
  • cucumbers
  • celery
  • romaine
  • spinach
  • lemon
  • collard greens
  • swiss chard
  • parsley
  • pears
  • daily vitamins
MASTER TONIC:  Our interpretation of this classic “detox” tonic made from alkalizing lemon, stimulating cayenne pepper, and mineral-rich coconut sugar, all mixed into alkaline water. Give your traditional lemonade a spicy kick that can rev up your metabolism, too!
  • purified alkaline water
  • lemon
  • coconut sugar
  • cayenne
  • cleansing
CAFE MOCHA:  Our classic Café Latte spiked with antioxidant-rich raw cacao, Café Mocha is your new early morning or late afternoon pick-me-up. Caffeinated with cold-pressed coffee beans, it’s less acidic than a traditional mocha and rich in protein from the cashews, hemp seeds and chia seeds in the creamy Cashew Hemp Mylk base.
  • coffee
  • dates
  • cashews
  • hemp seeds
  • chia seeds
  • cacao
  • coconut sugar
  • energy
  • sweet fix

Buy organic, cold-pressed juices and cleanses at Organic Avenue today!